Am I a zombie?

I had a dream.

For as long as I can remember, I have had this recurring nightmare wherein my teeth fall out. They just crumble right out of my mouth. It’s a horrendous experience, not merely because drool and bits of tooth spill forth into my cupped hands, but also because no one will pay any attention to me.

In these episodes I run in a panic from one person to the next, trying to get help. Each person acts like there is absolutely nothing abnormal about what is happening to me.

Because, you know, tooth crumbs are totes okay.

Even more frightening, for some reason, is that these dreams are episodic in nature; each one seems to pick up where the last one left off.

It’s as though there is a drama being played out in my brain, and I can’t manage to get the producers to cancel the show. Apparently the Nelson ratings are really great for the “Andi-Roo can’t hold on to her teeth!” show.

The tag line probably reads something like, “Tune in next year to see which tooth is next!”

Calm your tits, Andi-Roo.

I have been informed by various volunteer dream experts – or, okay, friends who like to play arm-chair psychologists – that dreaming my teeth fall out is fairly common and generally represents a fear of change or a lack of control.

Nobody has any ideas regarding the continued episodic nature of my nightmares, however. I guess dreams are not supposed to have an overlying story arc, but are instead intended to be one-offs, stand-alones, and single-shots.

In an attempt to:

1. see if my friends are more cray than I am;
2. get some mental handle on this stuff; and
3. makeitstopmakeitstopmakeitstop!

…I decided to consult le googles.

First stop: Dream Bible.

Because – duh – BIBLE, you guys.

To dream of teeth falling out  represents a loss of power, confidence, or self-esteem in some area of your life.

A corrosive situation or feelings of a loss of vitality.

Dreams of teeth falling out are common to people aging or who feel they are losing their looks.

It’s also common to people who are losing money, a career, or status of some kind.

Next stop: HyperDictionary

…which seems to agree with the Dream Bible’s assessment.

Dreaming that you have rotten or decaying teeth, forewarns that your health and/or business is in jeopardy.

You may have uttered some false or foul words and those words are coming back to haunt you.

Huh.

So my volunteer dream experts weren’t wrong on this count, insofar as explaining what the “my teeth fall out” dream is SUPPOSED to mean.

But I question if this is really what my subconscious is trying to tell me.

Sure, in the past I have had issues with powerlessness, lack of confidence, and low self-esteem, but I haven’t felt these fears since my late twenties… and I’m going on forty, so we’re talking, like, over a decade since I’ve seriously questioned my self-worth.

I don’t really have an issue with the fact that I’m aging, or losing my looks – actually, I’m kind of glad to have reached a state of existence wherein I can say FUGGIT when it comes to makeup or a lack thereof. I’m not thrilled with having fur all over my face, but I understand this comes with aging. Along with waxing and plucking.

As for losing money or career… BAHAHAHA! I’ve never had those things to begin with, so I can’t imagine why I’d be afraid of losing them.

I do like the suggestion that my words may be coming back to haunt me. But… my words come back to haunt me ALL THE FUCKING TIME. That happens when you don’t have a filter. I’m used to my words haunting me. They do that a lot. There is some serious haunting going on over here. My dream-teeth don’t need to remind me of something I live on a regular basis.

Why are my zombie teeth dreams recurring?

From one of the best movies ever: Little Shop of Horrors!

According to the Dream Bible:

To have recurring dreams points to unresolved issues, negative thinking patterns, unhealthy behaviors, or unexpressed emotions in your waking life.

Positively, recurring dreams may reflect your life purpose or a phase you are going through.

Well, if I have shit to resolve, we’re talking about shit that’s been bugging me since I was a teenager. And most of that shit is squashed. So I really don’t think it’s that.

And I refuse to believe that my teeth falling out, with people ignoring me, has anything to do with my life purpose.

Unless it means I’m supposed to go back to school and be a dentist.

Which, you know, fuck that.

Why are my zombie teeth dreams episodic?

It’s mine.

I couldn’t find anything to answer this question. Admittedly, I wasn’t trying very hard at this point.

Most Dream Interpretation sites are bullshit, where “most” means “all of them” but I was trying to be nice, and then I remembered belatedly that I’m not nice.

Ultimately, I think it comes down to this:

My mind is a scary place to be, particularly when court ain’t in session.

Are you a zombie, too?

• Do you have dreams of your teeth falling out?
• Are any of your dreams recurring?
• How about episodic? Do they pick up where they left off?

The post In which I dream I am a zombie and my teeth fall out. appeared first on The World 4 Realz.